An Academics Lament On Barbie Tab

-----------------------------------------------------------------
AN ACADEMIC'S LAMENT ON BARBIE - Crywank
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Tabbed by: Queries
Email: chroniic.idiocy@gmail.com
 
Tuning: Standard (EADGBe)
 
I figured out this tab from watching the performance here (timestamped): https://youtu.be/C8k0DlkBMwE?t=2184
 
For the strumming pattern that carries through the majority of the song, I find that the easiest way to do it
is to anchor the side of my hand, just above my wrist but not quite my thumb, above the strings, and use my
finger pads to roll over the strings for the soft sound heard in the song. For the strum down, just flick your
fingers down and quickly mute after strumming. Muting the high e string for the second chord is optional.
 
 
[Intro]
 
e|--0---------0----------0--0---------0----------0---------------|
B|----8---------8--------8----8---------8--------8---------------|
G|------9---------9------9------9---------9------9---------------|
D|--------9---------9----9--------9---------9----9---------------|
A|----------7---------7--7----------7---------7--7---------------|
E|-----------------------0-----------------------0---------------|
                                                                    x2
e|--0---------0----------0--0---------0----------0---------------|
B|----4---------4--------4----4---------4--------4---------------|
G|------5---------5------5------5---------5------5---------------|
D|--------5---------5----5--------5---------5----5---------------|
A|----------3---------3--3----------3---------3--3---------------|
E|-----------------------0-----------------------0---------------|
 
[Verse]
Like a flip flop feminist...
e|--0---------0----------0--0---------0----------0---------------|
B|----8---------8--------8----8---------8--------8---------------|
G|------9---------9------9------9---------9------9---------------|
D|--------9---------9----9--------9---------9----9---------------|
A|----------7---------7--7----------7---------7--7---------------|
E|-----------------------0-----------------------0---------------|
                                                                    x11
e|--0---------0----------0--0---------0----------0---------------|
B|----4---------4--------4----4---------4--------4---------------|
G|------5---------5------5------5---------5------5---------------|
D|--------5---------5----5--------5---------5----5---------------|
A|----------3---------3--3----------3---------3--3---------------|
E|-----------------------0-----------------------0---------------|
 
[Bridge]
Keep rolling on this chord for about 26 seconds, then sharply strum down but don't mute, and quickly go back
to rolling on that same chord. After that first sharp strum he does it once more, and then on the third he
begins the lyrics.
e|--0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0-----0----|---0---|
B|---8-----8-----8-----8-----8-----8-----8-----8-----8---|---8---|
G|----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9--|---9---|
D|-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-----9-|---9---|
A|------7-----7-----7-----7-----7------7----7-----7-----7|---7---|
E|-------------------------------------------------------|---0---|
 
Go by beats now, and every 4th beat you should sharply strum down without muting. How many rolls you do
in between each one depends on the speed that you roll at and your technique. After counting, I found that
James fits in roughly 5 rolls between each strum. For these strums it's important that you hit the open
E string and let it ring out whilst you're rolling. Let the final strum of this section ring out.
 
And now we are over the word count..
e|-0-|  |0-----0-----0-----0-----0------0---------------------------|
B|-8-|  |-8-----8-----8-----8-----8-----8---------------------------|
G|-9-|  |--9-----9-----9-----9-----9----9---------------------------|  x19
D|-9-|  |---9-----9-----9-----9-----9---9---------------------------|
A|-7-|  |----7-----7-----7-----7-----7--7---------------------------|
E|-0-|  |-------------------------------0---------------------------|
 
...Is the fact she's problematic.
 
[Breakdown]
 
For this section, focus on the lower strings. Listen to the song for the strumming pattern. The amount of
times the chord is written aligns with how many beats it takes up.
 
After quick and heavy editing...
e|   |  e|---0-0-0-0-|   |-0-0-0-0-|  |-0---0---0---0----|
B|   |  B|---8-8-8-8-|   |-4-4-4-4-|  |-11--11--11--11---|
G| x2|  G|---9-9-9-9-|   |-5-5-5-5-|  |-12--12--12--12---|
D|   |  D|---9-9-9-9-|x2 |-5-5-5-5-|  |-12--12--12--12---|
A|   |  A|---7-7-7-7-|   |-3-3-3-3-|  |-10--10--10--10---|
E|   |  E|---0-0-0-0-|   |-0-0-0-0-|  |-0---0---0---0----|
 
Duration of each chord changes here:
e|   |  e|---0-0-0-0-|   |-0-0-0-0-|  |-0---0---0---0----|
B|   |  B|---8-8-8-8-|   |-4-4-4-4-|  |-11--11--11--11---|
G| x2|  G|---9-9-9-9-|   |-5-5-5-5-|  |-12--12--12--12---|x2
D|   |  D|---9-9-9-9-|   |-5-5-5-5-|  |-12--12--12--12---|
A|   |  A|---7-7-7-7-|   |-3-3-3-3-|  |-10--10--10--10---|
E|   |  E|---0-0-0-0-|   |-0-0-0-0-|  |-0---0---0---0----|
 
[Outro]
 
You have failed your degree...
e|--0---------0----------0--0---------0----------0---------------|
B|----8---------8--------8----8---------8--------8---------------|
G|------9---------9------9------9---------9------9---------------|
D|--------9---------9----9--------9---------9----9---------------| x4
A|----------7---------7--7----------7---------7--7---------------|
E|-----------------------0-----------------------0---------------|
 
[Lyrics]
Like a flip flop feminists relationship with Barbie
 
Hardly the unsung perfectionist, perhaps white supremacist
 
Or Is this over analysis of plastic?
 
A fanatic franticly forge five thousand words
 
On the relevance and development of marketing to girls
 
And the harshness of the world, against all odds she worked 130 jobs
 
But still thrilled mostly by the presence of heartthrobs
 
Unaffected by patriarchy or recessions, but soon it must be questioned
 
Does the doll face only represent what first is projected
 
Grammar and spellcheck, half these points make no sense
 
The deadlines days away and their conclusions a conflicted mess
 
So how did molded plastic become so problematic
 
Where negi readings are dramatic but posis over-romantic
 
And maybe Barbie would rather be a gnarly dirty harpy
 
Tattoos drawn on with sharpie, kissing girls at a party
 
A figure once seen as pristine whilst preserved in a box
 
Most barbies end up naked and limbless with their hair shaved off
 
Perhaps it should be mentioned that Barbie would be sectioned
 
Having weigh-ins everyday for what others call perfection
 
You can say she's just a doll so what does their size really mean
 
60s slumber party Barbie still read books saying don't eat
 
Perhaps an ever-changing icon reflecting female progress
 
Perhaps a shallow feminism focused on individual success
 
 
And now we are over the word count
 
Got to edit down what's written with no conclusion found out
 
Tangled and confused and now scared of being misread
 
Wishing they'd done GI Joe male violence and conscription instead
 
Exhausting approaches Barbies subtext seems absent
 
A one dimensional character with endless multifacets
 
Time is nearly up they must be pragmatic
 
Conclusion: the most human thing about Barbie is the fact she's problematic
 
 
After quick and heavy editing
 
Self-flagellation for a cop-out ending
 
In time they hand their essay in
 
They forgot their referencing
 
 
You have failed your degree
 
£27,000 down the drain
 
Ask yourself, "Was it worth it?
 
What did you learn about Barbie?"
X